The Frontstretch: Top 10 Gimmicks To Spice Up The All-Star Race by Frontstretch Staff -- Wednesday May 15, 2013

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Top 10 Gimmicks To Spice Up The All-Star Race

Frontstretch Staff · Wednesday May 15, 2013


The Clown Segment: Drivers must wear clown costumes and finish the segment with at least a dozen people in the car.

10. The Live Monkey Segment: First driver to complete ten laps with a live monkey (with no seatbelt on) in his car wins.

9. Polish Victory Lap Segment: Robot stunt driver goes around the track backwards, Alan Kulwicki-style and all must avoid him throughout the 90-lap race.

8. The Race To the Finish: When NASCAR said drivers would run the last segment, they meant it literally. On foot.

7. Busch Clash Segment: The two Busch brothers start a 10-lap segment with the legal intent of trying to wreck as many drivers as possible. The first driver with an untouched car to cross the line wins.

6. The ‘Mater Segment: Field drives in reverse for 10 laps. No, not turning right. Backwards.

5. The Keselowski-Earnhardt Bonus Segment: Drivers all drink a 32-ounce beverage before first segment, finishing order of race to the Porta-Potty after Segment Three determines starting lineup for Segment Four.

4. Blind Qualifying: Put blindfold on drivers; see if they can make a lap without wrecking. Whoever gets the farthest starts on pole.

3. Juan Pablo Montoya Honorary Segment: Jet dryer runs entire race, sweeping up debris in main groove.

*2.*The Talent Search Segment: Driver from a small, underfunded team without a prayer of winning gets in the All-Star’s car for a segment, with the cars randomly chosen. Finishing order of underdog drivers determines the field for the next segment

1. The Crew Chief Swap Segment: Crew chiefs for this segment are determined by random draw; if they cheat on their competitor’s car, their regular driver has to carry a 300-pound, drunk fan in the passenger seat during the next segment.

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05/15/2013 11:20 AM

Add Danica to the race automatically and pump her up as a contender…oh wait…

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