Jeff Gordon and Ingrid's Wedding Day

[Cangal48]

Ladies and Gentlemen:

You are cordially invited to the wedding of Ingrid Vanderbosch and Jeffery Michael Gordon.  The wedding will take place at "some NASCRAP TRACK OF TOMORROW.  Please join the happy couple as they join as one on the track of life.

In true model fashion here comes the blushing bride.  She's making her 3rd lap around the church!  Just 197 laps to go before reaching the alter!  Wait there's a caution flag out as she's rounding aisle 2.  She's now heading towards the alter.  On route to the alter, the bride makes a pit stop.  Her team Hendricks bridesmaids work feverishly to fix her hair, makeup, adjust her dress, all in just 12:34 seconds.  She puts her stilletto heels to the ground and she's off towards the alter.

Minister:

"Jeffrey Michael Gordon do you take this fine piece of Belgian engineering to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold lap afte lap through wins and losses, and near close mishaps, as long as you both shall drive on the track of life?"

Jeffery Michael Gordon responds, "I do."


Minister:

"Do you Ingrid Vanderbosch, take this well built Dupont engine as you round life's oval over and over and over and over again?

Ingrid Vanderbosch responds "I do."


Minister:

"Jeffery Michael Gordon and Ingrid Vanderbosch, I now pronounce you NEXTEL CUP RACE husband and wife as you become the first entry into THE CHASE.  Ingrid, you may now join your husband, Jeff, in the garage area for closer inspection."

Before Ingrid tosses her bouquet, she shouts to all the ladies lined up, "LADIES START YOUR ENGINES."

Penelope Pit Stop in the wide bodied Dodge Charger is known to be a little loose in the rear end...she's taken out by Helen in the Ford Mustang, causing a 15 girl pile-up.  A high heel shoe is bouncing off the track.  Caution flag comes out!  Donna in the Chevy Impala SS just got her grill knocked in.  Rachel blew a right front tire and Debbie her complete engine.  Sonja, lost control when she three a break shoe rounding Table 5 heading for the checked flag near the Buffet table.

Now that the smoke and dust has settled.  We rejoin Tony Stewart as he makes his way to the Buffet Table, bumps into Georgina in the wide bodied Dodge Charger.  Spinning out of control passing on the DESSERT TABLE, bumping and grinding the wall on route to the SALAD BAR and finally crashing into the LIQUID REFRESHMENT TABLE, as the BUDWEISSER TEAM looks on.
 

[AfterShock]

Ladies and Gentlemen:

You are cordially invited to the wedding of Ingrid Vanderbosch and Jeffery Michael Gordon.  The wedding will take place at "some NASCRAP TRACK OF TOMORROW.  Please join the happy couple as they join as one on the track of life.

In true model fashion here comes the blushing bride.  She's making her 3rd lap around the church!  Just 197 laps to go before reaching the alter!  Wait there's a caution flag out as she's rounding aisle 2.  She's now heading towards the alter.  On route to the alter, the bride makes a pit stop.  Her team Hendricks bridesmaids work feverishly to fix her hair, makeup, adjust her dress, all in just 12:34 seconds.  She puts her stilletto heels to the ground and she's off towards the alter.

Minister:

"Jeffrey Michael Gordon do you take this fine piece of Belgian engineering to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold lap afte lap through wins and losses, and near close mishaps, as long as you both shall drive on the track of life?"

Jeffery Michael Gordon responds, "I do."


Minister:

"Do you Ingrid Vanderbosch, take this well built Dupont engine as you round life's oval over and over and over and over again?

Ingrid Vanderbosch responds "I do."


Minister:

"Jeffery Michael Gordon and Ingrid Vanderbosch, I now pronounce you NEXTEL CUP RACE husband and wife as you become the first entry into THE CHASE.  Ingrid, you may now join your husband, Jeff, in the garage area for closer inspection."

Before Ingrid tosses her bouquet, she shouts to all the ladies lined up, "LADIES START YOUR ENGINES."

Penelope Pit Stop in the wide bodied Dodge Charger is known to be a little loose in the rear end...she's taken out by Helen in the Ford Mustang, causing a 15 girl pile-up.  A high heel shoe is bouncing off the track.  Caution flag comes out!  Donna in the Chevy Impala SS just got her grill knocked in.  Rachel blew a right front tire and Debbie her complete engine.  Sonja, lost control when she three a break shoe rounding Table 5 heading for the checked flag near the Buffet table.

Now that the smoke and dust has settled.  We rejoin Tony Stewart as he makes his way to the Buffet Table, bumps into Georgina in the wide bodied Dodge Charger.  Spinning out of control passing on the DESSERT TABLE, bumping and grinding the wall on route to the SALAD BAR and finally crashing into the LIQUID REFRESHMENT TABLE, as the BUDWEISSER TEAM looks on.
 

............

Well, KNOCK ME DOWN AND COVER ME UP!!!!

 


And Help me off the floor!!!
I've fallen --- and I better not get up,..........or I'll read that again and be right back where I started. Sorta like a RE-laps.

Wayyyyyy C O O L !!! 
(**five shades and ten lenses is your score -- can I call you Can?
OH Can Ah' Dah. Eah?**)

Cracked my head off!!!
Yes it DID!

Stop it some MORE!!!
Please?

[Busch Babe 899]

LOL I needed the chuckle this morning....thanks!

[AfterShock]

"C H U C K L E ?!"

That's ALL?
Hmmmmmmm.


Read it again after your coffee B.Babe.
Just don't have any coffee in your mouth when you do.

Spew alert!