The Frontstretch: Top Ten Foreseeable Problems With NASCAR In China by Jeff Meyer -- Wednesday August 13, 2008

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Top Ten Foreseeable Problems With NASCAR In China

Jeff Meyer · Wednesday August 13, 2008

 

Editor’s Note: In honor of the Olympics, we wanted to bring back this popular Top Ten from last year, with a few tweaks — hope you enjoy it!

10. StarvingPeasant.com not allowed to sponsor a car.

9. Colossal statues and portraits of “Chairman Brian” begin popping up everywhere at all ISC tracks.

8. NASCAR rulebook increases from 100 pages to 1,000 when translated into Chinese. (Don’t worry, it still doesn’t make any sense!)

Brian France actually traveled to China in 2007 to explore possible NASCAR business partnerships overseas. But no publicized agreements were reached, and there’s no signs talks have continued since.

7. Brian France mandates that all rules will be enforced with traditional Chinese Government fervor and zeal.

6. Run-of-the-mill CoTs are mass produced in China and imported here with an ultimate plan to “save the teams money.”

5. Any Chinese venue not selling out at least 500,000 tickets per wace will be dropped from the schedule.

4. Greg Biffle’s dogs mysteriously disappear during a race in Beijing, never to be seen again.

3. Cars are “weewee woose in conners.”

2. ISC creates an “international incident” when it attempts to buy Tiananmen Square because it is “the perfect location” for a track.

1. No. 24 fans get all bent out of shape after locally hired spotter repeatedly says, “you queer gore don, you queer” each time Jeff passes a car.

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mkrcr
08/13/2008 09:04 PM
permalink

I love it but I’d be fired in a heartbeat for making those non- politically correct comments in my workplace.
Big ones, Jeff

 

Contact Jeff Meyer

Recent articles from Jeff Meyer:

Top Ten Things I Want To Say About The 2008 NASCAR Season
Don’t Worry! NASCAR Is In Capable Hands For 2009 and Beyond
Top Ten Reasons Homestead May Have The Lowest Ratings To Date
Almost On Cue, Bruton Dangles a Carrot, And Other NASCAR Tidbits
Top Ten Possible Reasons Carl Edwards' Car Got Such Good Gas Mileage

Want to know more about Jeff Meyer or view his complete article archives? Then hop on over to his archive and bio page.