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Jeff Meyer · Wednesday July 8, 2009
10. Their “hay day” has long past.
9. Both have produced an occasional “Thriller,” but not very often.
8. Unless there is a tragic fire, both will be the same color when they die/died (DYED?).
7. The tower Brian lives in is exactly the same color as Michael’s skin.
6. Both Brian and Michael give me the willies just looking at them.
5. Michael spent most of his life just wishing he could be a talented white guy, while Brian has spent a good amount of time wishing for a talented black guy.
4. Neverland and a NASCAR event share the same atmosphere.
3. Brian is not as picky as Michael, as he’s been screwing fans of all ages and sexes for years.
2. One had everything given to him by his dad, the other, well … looks like dad will get everything.
1. Rumors have it that Brian’s sister Lesa will have an unexpected “wardrobe malfunction” during next year’s opening ceremony of “NASCAR’s Super Bowl,” the Daytona 500.
Editor’s Note: Looking for a few more laughs today? If you haven’t seen it yet, check out this week’s Frontstretch Foto Funnies – Cutting Room Floor Edition, as Kurt Smith tells the story behind the pictures of some of your favorite drivers! If you need a little distraction from your driver getting hit by the Big One, or you need something to simply lighten up your day … this is the perfect column for you! Go check it out!
©2000 - 2008 Jeff Meyer and Frontstetch.com. Thanks for visiting the Frontstretch!
There is however, one (1) big difference between Michael (RIP), and King Brian!
Michael ATTRACTED fans!
King Brian REPELS fans!
And while we can call Michael’s death a real tradgedy, we could call King Brians death a real god-send!
(gee, that is cruel right),(any big large trees to hit on his drive home?)
And, while Michael may have been on injectable drugs, poor King Brian is on the liquid version, taken frequently by mouth. Now, if alchohol kills brain cells, I certainly hope King Brian protects the two (2) he has left!
“3. Brian is not as picky as Michael, as he’s been screwing fans of all ages and sexes for years.”
Fantastic! This should have been number 1.
I know it will happen…but I hope Brian France NEVER makes the HOF….But he should be the first in the nascar Hall Of Shame.
Jeff my man , you are proof positive that having your own blog requires no brains , talent , or common sense of any kind , you only need a keyboard .
Really? That’s supposed to be funny? Hmmm…
Michael Jackson enjoyed going around in circles on his Neverland Ranch ferris wheel. Brian the Brainless likes going around in circles on his bar stool at the Chart House in Daytona.
Obviously you didn’t do your research, because Joe Jackson, Michael’s father, was left out of his will and got nothing. This article was pointless, and not at all entertaining.
Wow, these sucked.
What, nothing about Bubbles the pet monkey in here?
Sorry Hank, jokes about pet monkeys is a moral line that I am not willing to cross. It would be in bad taste and I hold myself to a higher journalistic standard than that!
Ha Ha! Look at all the Michael Jackson lovers coming here to defend his holiness!
Turn off American Idol, Oprah….hell, just turn the damn TV off! And get a life!
What a total waste of time. It’s obvious you know little about MJ, and have no class at all.
I know enough about MJ. A glorified pedophile who bought his was out of prosecution. If BF has a secret room in his bedroom, with motion sensors in the hallway, I’m sure it’s just to protect his private reserve.
MikeG, if they nominated a felonous scumbag like Rick Hendrick for the Hall of Fame, you can bet that Brian France will sadly be nominated.
i LOL’d hard at #3, theres going to be alot of us going to hell for laughing at that..
I’ll take a window seat plz
Recent articles from Jeff Meyer:
Voices From The Cheap Seats: The Tale Of Two Tires
BSNews! Bruton’s Plans Extend Beyond Bristol’s Track
Top Ten Reasons Fans Failed To Show Up At Bristol Sunday
BSNews! NASCAR CEO Given "Special" Award Amidst Lavish Fanfare
Fan Coun-ci-What? Just What Is It That NASCAR Wants To Study?
Want to know more about Jeff Meyer or view his complete article archives? Then hop on over to his archive and bio page.