The Frontstretch: Top Ten Reasons Juan Pablo Montoya Was Speeding On Pit Road by Jeff Meyer -- Wednesday July 29, 2009

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Top Ten Reasons Juan Pablo Montoya Was Speeding On Pit Road

Jeff Meyer · Wednesday July 29, 2009

 

So you’re telling me even after that speeding penalty, you’ve still got the yayo?

10. He’s been hanging with Jeremy Mayfield.

9. NASCAR spiked his segment samples.

8. Was too eager to drink Gatorade after a win at Indy instead of milk.

7. Had a chick in the car with him we couldn’t see … you know, some guys go faster, some go slower.

6. He had a target on his back.

5. He agreed to be part of NASCAR’s giant conspiracy to have Jimmie Johnson win four Cup titles in a row.

4. His Colombian buddies raised the price of Brian France’s weekly supply of “foot powder.”

3. Didn’t think there were any cops around.

2. Duh! He was going too fast!

1. Forgot his tach didn’t read in kilometers!

Editor’s Note: If you haven’t seen it yet, check out this week’s Frontstretch Foto Funnies – Indianapolis Edition, as Kurt Smith tells the story behind the pictures of your favorite drivers this weekend! It won’t take long, and hopefully you can have a good laugh — especially if you need a wake-up call if some of Sunday’s 400-miler put your to sleep!

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Ken
07/29/2009 08:39 AM
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#4 and #5 are bang on!!

Andrew
07/29/2009 10:47 AM
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heh these are like horrific car accidents…I have to tune in every week to see if they get better…but they don’t… oh well. plz keep trying.

Don Mei
07/29/2009 11:38 AM
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Number 11…Ganassi’s weekly envelope to Don Brian was a bit light.

Douglas
07/29/2009 03:47 PM
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#4 is “BANG ON”!

(note: “foot powder” is not listed on NA$CRAPS banned drug list) mmm, wonder why?

 

Contact Jeff Meyer

Recent articles from Jeff Meyer:

Top Ten Signs NASCAR Has Employed Bill Weber the Magician
2009 Season Review: Carl Edwards
Top Ten Things I Want To Say About The 2009 NASCAR Season
NASCAR Scheduled To Throw Eight Cautions At Homestead
Top Ten Reasons Jimmie Johnson Might Not Win The Chase, Redux

Want to know more about Jeff Meyer or view his complete article archives? Then hop on over to his archive and bio page.