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Jeff Meyer · Wednesday November 4, 2009
10. Realized that the fans in Fontana might be on to something and checked out the “shopping” under the grandstands.
9. Looked for the No-Doz vendors Tony’s crew chief spoke of over the radio.
8. Decided not to buy AMP Energy drinks when they realized the race was staged the way it was as a marketing ploy to get people to buy AMP Energy drinks!
7. Changed the frequencies on their scanners to listen to truckers on the Interstate … or classical music, whichever.
6. That “Honey-do” list that she’s been bitchin’ about.
5. “On second thought, honey, I’d love to go fall shoe shopping with you and your mother!”
4. Look for one of those wet T-shirt contests going on that everyone is always talking about in the infield.
3. Made plans to change their “NASCAR room” into a “golf room” and wondered how much they might get on eBay from all their NASCAR junk.
2. Switched channels to see what games were on, even if it meant watching the Lions.
1. Looked for the vendor rumored to be selling “Brian France Sucks” (front) “Mike Helton Swallows” (back) T-shirts. (Unfortunately, the vendor ran out of stock by lap 100)
Editor’s Note: If you haven’t seen it yet, check out this week’s Frontstretch Foto Funnies – Talladega Edition, as Kurt Smith tells the story behind the pictures of your favorite drivers this weekend! It won’t take long, and hopefully you can have a good laugh — especially if Sunday’s race put you to sleep!
©2000 - 2008 Jeff Meyer and Frontstetch.com. Thanks for visiting the Frontstretch!
I’ll vote for your #1 as the ABSOLUTE BEST!
(maybe of ever)
MMM, come to think of it, maybe that’s why Helton is so fat! err, I’m sorry, LARGE!
Hey, in thinkng, I thought this top 10 list was supposed to be FUNNY!
NOT the TRUTH! (referencing #1 of course)
Readers, I have been informed that in regards to number 9, it was Tony’s spotter, not his crew chief, that made the no doz comment. I deeply regret the mistake but in my defense, I was tired and couldn’t find the vendor!
OMFG, #1 is the BEST!!!!
#10 is an acceptable remark about Fontana, and its funny, too. Its much appreciated compared to the usual around here.
Didn’t this top 10 hit everything on the nose! Keep up the good work, maybe NASCAR will start listening…..LOL! Yea, right!
LOL Top 10 things – absolutely great.
You left off the one about just go home and rake the leaves and clean out the gutters!
Well, just had to get yet another laugh before nightime falls, but while I can stomach items #2 thru #10, I have a hard time swallowing your #1!
Better be careful Jeff. The NASCAR suits are going to be looking for you. Funny column. The shoe shopping one was my favorite.
Recent articles from Jeff Meyer:
Voices From The Cheap Seats: The Tale Of Two Tires
BSNews! Bruton’s Plans Extend Beyond Bristol’s Track
Top Ten Reasons Fans Failed To Show Up At Bristol Sunday
BSNews! NASCAR CEO Given "Special" Award Amidst Lavish Fanfare
Fan Coun-ci-What? Just What Is It That NASCAR Wants To Study?
Want to know more about Jeff Meyer or view his complete article archives? Then hop on over to his archive and bio page.