The Frontstretch: BSNews! Carl Strikes Back, The Colombian Connection & Harvick Dumps A... by Jeff Meyer -- Thursday August 11, 2011

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BSNews! Carl Strikes Back, The Colombian Connection & Harvick Dumps A...

Voices From the Heartland · Jeff Meyer · Thursday August 11, 2011

 

BSNews recently had the opportunity to sit down with Carl Edwards for a quick interview, discussing his possible move to the broadcast booth for the Nationwide Series in 2012. Let’s get right to it…

BSNews: So Carl, what can you tell us about your possible future in the broadcast booth?

Carl Edwards: I’d love to, but first let me ask you… how much do you make?

BSN: ‘Scuse me?

Edwards: How much do you make from BSN for this interview?

BSN: What are you talking abo…

Edwards: They have to be offering you something. How much? Do you get paid by the hour? By the word? Maybe you are salaried. You have a contract with them? How long have you been working there?

BSN: I… I… I… I don’t see how that has to do with anything!

Edwards: It doesn’t, but I want to know! Are you thinking about moving up… say to the Charlotte Observer, NASCAR Online… something like that. Have any of them offered you more to work for them?

BSN: Well… that’s sorta personal, ain’t it? I don’t think I want to discuss it. The Observer! NOL! (laugh) Puhlease!

Edwards: Well, that’s what we’ve been hearing in the garage. Word is, you’ve even been offered an unprecedented perk of a used Chrysler K car for your personal use. Is that true?

BSN: Well, like I said, I don’t want to talk about it. Can we just get on with this interview?

Edwards: I know BSNews is a subsidiary of Frontstretch.com… what has Tom Bowles offered you, if anything, to stay with them?

BSN: I just don’t see how that’s any of your business!

Edwards: Have you been offered Jim Utter’s job? Or maybe you could replace Monte Dutton over at the Gaston Gazette. Tell me! It’s OK, whatever you do, I respect your decision.

BSN: Screw you, Edwards!

Edwards: (Hearty laughter) Ahhhh, I’m just joshing you! Let’s get on with that interview now.

BSN: Forget it! I done dealing with nosy Nellies who think they need to know everything about my business! (BSN reporter storms out. Door slams. End of interview.)

The Columbian Connection

As reported by our colleagues over at Sporting News, police in Huntersville, N.C., made a drug bust Tuesday, and one of those arrested is a front tire changer on Juan Pablo Montoya’s No. 42 Earnhardt-Ganassi Racing Sprint Cup car. Trevor L. Lysne, 40, is charged with trafficking marijuana, possession with intent to sell and deliver marijuana and maintaining a dwelling to distribute marijuana, according to the police report. Jerome D. Frey, 27, also was charged with trafficking marijuana and possession with intent to sell and deliver after the Huntersville Police Department intercepted about 10-1/2 pounds of marijuana that had been shipped out of California. Frey is a mechanic at Earnhardt-Ganassi.

Lysne and Frey became a “Target” of an investigation when it was noticed that the psi of the front tires was always running a little high and recent carburetors on the No. 42 EGR car suspiciously resembled a sophisticated (but extraordinarily designed) hookah.

“While the tire pressures were well within NASCAR limits, the hookah…I mean carburetor, did not meet the strict standards set forth by Brian Fr…I mean NASCAR,” said a spokesperson for EGR. “We are certainly glad that these individuals have been weeded out of our organization and our sport.”

Time will only tell if Juan Pablo’s driving will become less erratic due to these sudden team developments.

Kevin vs. Delana

BSNews has learned that Kevin Harvick is following fellow Cup driver, Kurt Busch’s cue, and is said to be splitting up with his wife Delana.

Sources say that a “blowup” between the two at a recent Yankees game… wait a minute… I’ve just been handed this bulletin… Oh! I get it now, my bad!

Kevin is scheduled to throw out the first PITCH at an upcoming Yankee’s game!

BSNews regrets that unfortunate mistake.

BSNews; Your first thought is our first name!

Stay off the wall, (and off the weed!)

Jeff Meyer

Contact Jeff Meyer

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JJ48
08/11/2011 01:50 AM
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Marijuana makes you hungry…….for tacos.

Don Mei
08/11/2011 04:36 PM
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Don’t Bogart that joint my friend……….paasssssssssssit over to meeee!!!

old farmer
08/12/2011 11:12 AM
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Juan Pablo Moncolumbian’s team—whoda thunk it?

 

Contact Jeff Meyer

Recent articles from Jeff Meyer:

Voices From The Cheap Seats: The Tale Of Two Tires
BSNews! Bruton’s Plans Extend Beyond Bristol’s Track
Top Ten Reasons Fans Failed To Show Up At Bristol Sunday
BSNews! NASCAR CEO Given "Special" Award Amidst Lavish Fanfare
Fan Coun-ci-What? Just What Is It That NASCAR Wants To Study?

Want to know more about Jeff Meyer or view his complete article archives? Then hop on over to his archive and bio page.