The Frontstretch: Top Ten Sponsors Currently Courting Kurt Busch and Phoenix Racing by Jeff Meyer -- Wednesday June 27, 2012

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10. WWE…they allow anything over there!

“If Kurt would grow an awesome beard like mine, I bet he could get Just For Men on his hood…”

9. Rick Hendrick. Oh, wait… he already is behind the scenes. Next!

8. The band Crash Test Dummies.

7. Starburst (get it? He was a star but now… oh, nevermind!)

6. Charlie Sheen and his new show on FX, “Anger Management.”

5. Maury Povich. Rumor has it Jerry and Maury may even duke it out on live television; the winner gets to sponsor Kurt.

4. Any local law firm whose motto is something like… “Turn that wreck, into a check!”

3. Orbitz gum. For a clean mouth no matter what.

2. Bobby’s Gourmet Elephant Ears.

1. Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?…

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Don
06/27/2012 11:44 AM
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Charlie Sheen works for me!

Kurt Supporter
06/27/2012 04:09 PM
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Wow! original! While people are coming out in support of him, you keep hacking him in the back with a butchers knife! Great work! Bet your gonna win some type of writing award and get a cookie too!

DougS
06/27/2012 05:37 PM
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Maricopa Sheriff’s office: They love repeat business.

Hubba Bubba bubble gum. Hard to answer question with a chewy mouthful of Hubba Bubba.

Raid: Takes care of all pest’s including journalists.

WhiteHouse.gov No one spins better than Kurt

Electric Sunglasses: The fine print reads must wear helmet at all times.

NASCAR: Since implementation of the new points system, boy have at it went out the window and they need something to keep them in the news.

Charles Haney Golf Clinic: If I can fix Charles Barkley swing I can fix Kurt’s interviewing prowess.

Calgon: When you absolutely must get away.

TSA: Where assault is a daily occurrence.

Tampax: For those heavier than normal flows that must be stopped.

 

Contact Jeff Meyer

Recent articles from Jeff Meyer:

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Want to know more about Jeff Meyer or view his complete article archives? Then hop on over to his archive and bio page.