The Frontstretch: Best of Top Ten: Top Ten Things to Say to Hurt a NASCAR Driver's Feelings by Mistie Bibbee -- Tuesday December 27, 2005

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10.  Dude, your uniform makes you look fat.

9.  Wow, you’re still racing?  I thought they forced drivers your age to retire.

8.  Hey, isn’t your nickname "Mr. Provisional"?

7.  You really think you are a racer?  Man, I could beat you in my grandmother’s Ford Escort.

6.  Is it true you know Dale Jr?  Could you get him to autograph this hat for me?

5.  I’ve had trips to the dentist that were less painful than watching you race.

4.  Wouldn’t you be better equiped to star in a demolition derby?

3.  Aren’t you Jimmie Johnson’s motorcoach driver?

2.  Geez man… did you take one to many hits to the wall at 190 mph?

1.  Autograph?  No, thanks.  I was just curious if I could borrow your Sharpie for a minute.

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NASCAR Easter Eggs: A Few Off-Week Nuggets to Chew On
Five Points To Ponder: NASCAR’s Take-A-Breath Moment
Truckin’ Thursdays: Top Five All-Time Truck Series Drivers
Going By the Numbers: A Week Without Racing Can Bring Relief But Kill Momentum
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©2000 - 2008 Mistie Bibbee and Frontstetch.com. Thanks for visiting the Frontstretch!

 

Recent articles from Mistie Bibbee:

Mistie Bibbee
Best of the Top Ten: Top Ten Reasons Why I am Retiring from the Frontstretch
Best of Top Ten: Top Ten Things I Learned During the Daytona 500
Best of Top Ten: Top Ten Names For Next October's Race in Charlotte
Best of Top Ten: Top Ten Polls in Which Fans are Most Likely to Vote for Jr.

Mistie no longer writes for the Frotnstch, but if you'd like to know more about her, check out her archive and bio page.