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Mistie Bibbee · Tuesday December 13, 2005
10. Repeatedly ask “How hard could it be to drive in circles all day? My pet hamster could do that.”
9. As he’s about to walk out the door to do an interview, “You know buddy, that fire suit sure isn’t very flattering. It kinda makes you look fat.”
8. When he wins a race, don’t meet him in victory lane. Encourage the rest of the crew to do the same.
7. Refuse to put the steering wheel in the car at the beginning of the race until he kisses your cheek and calls you sugar button.
6. While he’s napping in the hauler during a rain delay, paint his finger nails a lovely shade of pink or purple.
5. Sing the Hamster Dance song continually over the radio throughout the entire race.
4. “Accidentally” include the driver’s personal cell phone number in a letter that goes out to all the members of their fan club.
3. Every time he does an interview stand behind him and continually mimic him until he loses his concentration.
2. Slide your cell phone in the pocket of his uniform. Make sure the phone is on vibrate. Then repeatedly call the phone each time he attempts to pass a car.
1. Change the pit stall location with other teams for every pit stop during the race.
©2000 - 2008 Mistie Bibbee and Frontstetch.com. Thanks for visiting the Frontstretch!
Recent articles from Mistie Bibbee:
Best of the Top Ten: Top Ten Reasons Why I am Retiring from the Frontstretch
Best of Top Ten: Top Ten Things I Learned During the Daytona 500
Best of Top Ten: Top Ten Names For Next October's Race in Charlotte
Best of Top Ten: Top Ten Polls in Which Fans are Most Likely to Vote for Jr.
Mistie no longer writes for the Frotnstch, but if you'd like to know more about her, check out her archive and bio page.