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Editor’s Note : What follows is Frontstretch’s newest weekly column, appearing at first as a three part series and written by none other than Thompson in Turn 5’s Tommy Thompson. Please comment below and let us know what you think…expect this to become a regular staple at FS on Fridays next year!
It’s been said that “the mind is a beautiful thing.“Whoever coined that phrase never took a stroll through my mind when it starts wandering, though. Beautiful would hardly describe the thoughts that muddle my, for the most part, lucid thought process.
I am constantly purging my brain of this ridiculous (or is it?) NASCAR refuse, and I am more than willing to share it with you, the reader.
1. Do ex-Cup drivers really go to the Craftsman Truck Series to die?
2. Seriously…how does a driver hold his “water” for so many hours in those race cars?
3. If Mojo, Tony Stewart’s pet monkey, is as bummed as his fans that he didn’t make the Chase after all the success he’s had?
4. Why is Greg Biffle’s dog of choice those bug-eyed boxers?
5. Would Richard Simmons have to be medicated and institutionalized after a Wally’s World ride-a-long segment?
6. Who is Brooke Gordon’s “favorite driver” now?
7. What color should the “move over, your teammate wants by” flag be, and when will the flagman start carrying one?
8. Why won’t teams hire cheerleaders for pit road?
9. Did the Chase contenders ever point and laugh at the other 33 drivers?
10. Has Robert Yates considered signing Dave Marcis to drive the No. 88?
11. Did someone tell Tony Stewart that a 3-day stubble makes him look thinner?
12. Shouldn’t there be a law requiring Sirius Satellite Radio to let us swap out our XM equipment at no charge next season?
13. Has Matt Kenseth ever asked Dale Earnhardt, Jr. if he wanted to hold his championship trophy?
14. Is the NASCAR rulebook really an etch-a-sketch?
15. Do Chad Knaus and Todd Berrier cheat at poker?
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16. If their tires are bald when they start out, why do they lose grip before they reach the cords?
Why dont the slower cars use Dale Earnhardt rule of thumb,Lead,Follow or get out of the way!!!!
Why do the cars that are so slow they are already several laps down line up in the way of the leaders?
Is that the only way they can get TV time?
Let’s hope XM keeps racing alive in 2007.
Regarding the #88…Marcus would be a stud in that machine. It’s been painted brown for years now and his wing tips he races in are brown! Karma?
You asked: Seriouslyâ€¦how does a driver hold his â€œwaterâ€ for so many hours in those race cars?
They don’t. Ask around and someone can probably tell you what really happens :-)
Love it! Always wondered How many speeding tickets Nascar drivers get a year?