10. Mark Martin: “I didn’t HAVE to win one, I get in the Shootout forever-which is handy, ’cause that’s how long I’m gonna race!”

9. Robby Gordon: “Pole? I thought they said HOLE! I went off-road racing so much I thought I should avoid that…”

8. Clint Bowyer: “They gave all the fast cars to Jeff Burton and Kevin Harvick.”

7. Dale Earnhardt Jr.: “Yeah, yeah. It was-wait, I can’t blame the crew chief anymore, uh, at least I am popular!”

6. Sterling Marlin: Poles? I’m lucky I made all the races!

5. Ward Burton: “I always have the pole. It is in the bed of my truck beside the tackle box and bait.”

4. Martin Truex Jr.: “Like, What was the question? Sorry, I had to go to the bathroom…”

3. David Gilliland: “No really people, I DID win a pole in ’06. Seriously!”

2. Matt Kenseth: “At least I run up front when it COUNTS!”

1. Tony Stewart: “I would have won the pole for the Pepsi 400 but Boris Said beat me by a hair.”