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*10.* “I had dinner at Brian France’s place the other night. I thought the oregano in the spaghetti sauce smelled funny!” *9.* “I gave Shane Hmiel a ride home the other night and you know the old saying…grass, gas or ass, nobody rides for free! Well, he was broke and I wasn’t about to…well, you know!”

Top Ten Excuses Jeremy Mayfield Gave For Failing The Drug Test

10. “I had dinner at Brian France’s place the other night. I thought the oregano in the spaghetti sauce smelled funny!”

9. “I gave Shane Hmiel a ride home the other night and you know the old saying… grass, gas, or ass, nobody rides for free! Well, he was broke and I wasn’t about to… well, you know!”

8. “They must have mixed my pee up with one of my crew guys.”

7. “I suck at tests.”

6. “They were serious about that?”

5. “All I did was have a poppy seed bagel!”

4. “Damn that Carl Edwards!”

3. “My wife slipped me something in her scheme to take over my team.”

2. “Rest assured, I will be filing a complaint with the BBB against that web site that sold me that urine. It was guaranteed “clean.” I want my money back!”

1. “I didn’t study.”

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