9. The rest of the field to Dale Earnhardt Jr.: The view from the front once in a while.
6. Jeremy Mayfield to Brian France: A burning brown paper bag of… well you know, on his porch with a note saying “Test This!!”
5. Megan France to Brian France: An offer to re-marry (again) or more lawyer bills. His choice.
3. Richard Petty to George Gillett: A swift kick in the ass.
1. Jeff Gordon to Jimmie Johnson: A spotter.
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