10. Thought the Red Impala up ahead was Kevin Harvick stopped at a crowded intersection, surrounded by innocent people with no clue he was “dropping by.”
9. “You know these damn Toyotas and the sticking accelerator pedals! Wait… did you say I was driving a Lexus?”
8. Too distracted texting votes for Kirstie Alley to win Dancing With the Stars… then blamed it on the “unnamed girl” in the passenger seat.
7. Distraught over Oprah calling it quits.
6. Somebody took the plate off.
5. Trying to pay Toyota/Lexus back for naming this new sports car after his nickname (LFA: Loudmouthed and Frickin’ Annoying).
4. Wanted to be first in line at the KBM yard sale.
3. Coming home from his classes at the Michael Waltrip Academy of Offensive Street Driving and was looking for a motorcyclist.
2. Joe Gibbs had texted the Apocalypse was only delayed by 72 hours, max, so he wanted to dress nice for the Rapture.
1. Thought officers would place him on NASCAR probation, not actually get him in trouble by dishing out a real ticket.
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